Purely Heartstopping
I've gradually been getting more and more cross with the commentary on Heartstopper's lack of sexual content. This comes up in all media, but I am particularly looking at Trixie and Katya's otherwise very entertaining review on Youtube, and the mainly glowing review from the podcast Chucky, as well as multiple print and online reviews which choose to excuse it, rather than consider why such choices might be made. I'm just going to have a mini rant to get it off my chest.
The graphic novel series was conceived and has been delivered as a young teen suitable story about love, in itself a highly valuable exercise in providing a different kind of representation to young LGBTQ+ teens beyond the often quite sensationalised and graphic representation of teenage relationships in general. The scene in S2 Episode 6 of the tv series where Nick says he is not ready to do more than kissing, has caused the most amount of disbelief and in some cases scorn and so I am going to use that to contend that whilst the chasteness is unlikely given the general randyness of teenagers on average, it is not unrealistic in the context of the characters or in what the books or tv series are trying to do.
The first thing I want to ask is whether it would create as much laughter and disbelief if it was a girl saying these things? So, is there a bit of sexism going on here? Boys aren't allowed to be nervous and unsure of themselves, or to think that they are not emotionally ready?
Secondly let's look at Nick's character arc. Idealised dream boyfriend as he is, it's still worth asking are his words and actions consistent with what we know about him? Until a couple of months ago he thought he was a straight boy, and it is only in the preceding scene that he has just spoken about his bisexuality to anyone beyond the people close to him. Earlier, in episode 5, we saw Nick speak some wise words to Elle about 'you don't always have to have everything worked out, sometimes you can just feel'... We see him struggling with that concept himself in this scene - he clearly feels, but isn't ready to leap. We've seen in his coming out journey that the idea is great, it's easy to talk the talk, but the reality is harder. Couldn't the same be true here, in that building confidence to make your wishes a reality sometimes takes time?
Thirdly, Heartstopper consistently models good healthy conversations about all sorts of things including sex, and Nick's words come in the middle of a good conversation about consent. Charlie, who is clearly further along in his journey starts to push things a tiny little bit, then asks if it is ok. Nick first says yes, but hesitantly, and Charlie then asks again, when Nick admits how he really feels and they agree to wait until they are both ready. Beautiful. That's how to do it. That should be noted as a teachable moment if anything should. It might not happen often in that way, but how many people, whatever their sexuality might have wished for that conversation.
One of the many things I love about this series in both the books and the tv show is the antidote to the hyper-sexualisation of teenage lives and gay life in particular, and this gives not just a balance to that view, but also provides something that may feel like reality to at least a minority of teens, whether coming to terms with their sexuality or not. That doesn't mean prudishness, There are open conversations about sex throughout, and particularly in volume 5 (currently being pre-released in instalments on Webtoon, full book due out in December) where we see that sexual relationship develop too.
So, although Katya and Trixie fell about laughing when Nick said what he said, I wonder if they later reflected on their own assumptions, particularly getting that 'teachable moment' about about asexuality in the following episodes. I also wonder whether the adults thinking that it is unrealistic are truly thinking back to themselves as young teens. Despite the newness and urgency of that sex drive kicking in, how many of those adults were truly having sex (at least with other people!) at that age, or would have really been prepared if it had happened? I think there is sometimes some selective memory going on. I know I am old, and a bit weird, but my teen years between 14 and 16 were not hotbeds of sexual experimentation and looking at my kids and the younger generation that I know, I don't think that was true for all of them either. So, in terms of realism/representation, for some of the teenage community at least, it strikes a little bit true.
Despite the lack of sexual content, the books are currently being banned in a number of US states because of the assumption that something about LGBTQ+ relationships must be sex oriented. Those assumptions about teenagers and sex seem surprisingly similar to those very LGBTQ+ positive reviewers I am taking issue with who assume sex is always on the menu. So lastly, I refer the Court back to the constant message of Heartstopper that assumptions about people and relationships are harmful and everyone is on their own journey. That should also allow some space for the idea that not all teenagers or all gay or bi boys are leaping into bed with each other at every opportunity.
Right, I'm done.... as you were.
After I wrote this I watched this Obviously Queer video on YouTube and they cover some of the same ground slightly more articulately than me, and make some other really good points - worth a watch, whether you agree or not
Comments
Post a Comment